adoyo molla
1 min readJun 3, 2021

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I remember when I told my parents I had broken off my engagement. I was 28. My dad's next words gave me a freedom I didn't even know I needed. He said, "marriage is not a marathon. You don't get a medal for doing it. Your happiness is what counts. Whether that's with someone or by yourself." He then added, "There's no hurry in Africa." And after that, no amount of shaming bothers me. I now walk away from situations that don't honour me so fast they don't even know what happened. I'm tots comfortable and like 98% of my friends are married. I'm not against marriage or dating. They just don't define me. And I refuse to let other peoples opinions imprison me. But yeah, my dad was the one who broke the nonsensical pull that society has on women and our relationship status. P.S. it allowed me to focus on myself, do some self-care like finally going to therapy. I'm a much, healthier whole version of myself and if and when I get into a relationship, it will be for the right reasons and I'll be a much better partner. 😎

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adoyo molla

Be Unapologeitcally You! I write for those ready to break societal molds and live life on their terms,, with kindness and empathy.